Skip to main content

Contributing Writer: Cariahnna



The idea of self-love has always been a complex subject for me to wrap my head around. I mean it sounds like something so simple and you would think the basis of our existence on this earth would be to love the one and only definite thing that we’ll ever know—ourselves. Unfortunately, for many, including myself, the journey to self-love hasn’t always been so kind. As a sexual and emotional abuse survivor finding myself was not always something that I knew I needed to do. However, the past few years have made me so grateful for the “body positive” movement because it has challenged me to destroy negative body image ideals that I once had. With tremendous weight gain during high school followed by tremendous weight loss after the end of a toxic 5 year relationship and then the regain of weight upon entering a healthy relationship all the while battling high anxiety and depression, my idea of what a “beautiful body” was was very skewed. Watching other women truly put their whole selves, “flaws” and all on the internet made me so envious at first. All I wanted was to be able to love every inch of my being like they did. These women were free and slaves to no-ones beauty standards. I yearned for that sense of freedom.

It took a lot of prayer, tears, and courage to get to where I am now mentally. I had to trust myself— I have to trust myself. To be body positive is not to simply wake up one morning and love everything about yourself. Like any relationship, having a body positive relationship with yourself requires hard work. You have to wake up every morning and make the conscious decision to accept who you are and say “Its okay that I have (insert something you’re insecure about), but I know that I am worthy of love and that I add value to the world that I exist in.” You have to live in a consistent space of self acceptance and be realistic with yourself. If you know that something is causing you harm, then fix it, but if you’re simply insecure because the world told you that you should be then you have to plant your feet firmly in the ground, look back at the world, and say, “Screw you, I AM GOOD ENOUGH. And I won’t let anyone take that freedom from me.” Being body positive has nothing to do with being perfect and contrary to popular belief just because you are body positive doesn’t mean that you still don’t have insecurities— it simply means that you won’t allow your insecurities to stop you from living your life freely.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Lessons for a Break Up

About two or three months ago, a friend of mine was going through a break-up.  They were a cute couple, and she was my close friend, he, my ex's best friend. She was devastated but, she no longer wanted to be in a relationship in which she felt limited. I gave her the best advice I could one night, sighting lessons from my own relationship, one that had not yet ended. I sent a list of ways to cope, move on, forgive herself. It has been an entire month since I parted ways with my ex. A MONTH. Where has the time gone. I feel a little stronger everyday. I am learning to lean and to lean deep into what is going on around me. Last night, I was going through my phone and I found the list. And there it was: cogent, genuine lessons from right inside me. I did not know how refreshing it was to know that there was truth within, however limited it may feel now. Today, I'm sharing that list with you. I hope it helps you through any trial you may be facing. Please share your opinions...
Post a Comment
Read more

July 31, 2019: When there is a sign

July 31, 2019 There are a million and one things that constantly grab our attention every day. Those things can be but are surely not limited to our phones, computers, social media, our significant others, friends and even family.  Despite what we tell ourselves were addicted. We are addicts to the lives of others; the amount of times we check our phones and compare ourselves to the person looking happy on other side invalidates our outlook on ourselves. One of the things we forget when we become addicted to this fantasy is the positive attention, we need to put on ourselves. For some this may sound like some weird conspiracy theory that you’ve heard so many times but don’t want to believe, but for others you might think well hey you’re right maybe I should focus some time on myself, but where do I even begin?  Well hold your horses I’m not saying to drop everything you’ve ever known; drop all the people you’ve ever cared about or throw your phone out the window; because...
Post a Comment
Read more

Contributing Writer: Abby

Let’s talk about identity. The journey to finding your identity is ever evolving both professionally and personally. As a former student athlete, athlete was always my identity. I was never just a student, I was a student athlete… that is even how I was introduced to others even after my career. “This is Abby, she was a Division One student athlete…” was frequently the phrase used when friends, family and bosses introduced me to others, and I had a sense of pride with it too. Though, as my athlete title began to slip away, my “Corporate” identity began to resonate stronger. At work I was incredibly hungry to grow in my career, so I did things I thought would get my farther...such as biting my tongue in meetings where I had an opinion but I was just the “young, pretty employee” in the room, so I should listen. Slowly, I realized, I began to leave pieces of my personality at the door when I entered the office as a way to earn respect from my male counter parts. If I was more masculine t...
Post a Comment
Read more